An Apple And The Pasture

Monday, July 30, 2007
[[b3+h]]

I chanced upon this sweet entry. (Or rather she made me go see)

Knew her since J2 I think, when she bought the stupid hairband thing. Lol. Didn't exactly meet her, but we could crap quite a lot online. Sometimes I felt like killing her for being sooooo forgetful. Other times though, am glad that we could click so well.

She was. and still is my No. 1 fan.

I shan't put her pic here cos she have not give me a decent one lol..

Will talked about the fantastic NDP preview some other day. Major photo editing to do.

Friday, July 27, 2007
[[Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows]]

This is the first time I have written such a long title. Also the first time that the title looked normal and easy to read.

Replused, when I first heard about the death tolls in the book. Got me contemplating whether to even touch it in the first place.
Gave in to temptations finally.

A book that had mercilessly killed so many characters so dear to HP series fans. Could not picture the reactions of many (especially children), crying whilst reading it. A nasty but clever way of reminding everyone as to how each and every of such character contributed to the series. Except for the fact that Rowling kept on repeating that "Dumbledore is dead", there was nothing much I could complain.

The book, in my opinion was a brillant piece of artwork. Loose ends were smartly tied, words well chosen. Everything seemed to be justified to be there. Except, maybe the last chapter, the names might leave the half-witted ones more confused. I could only vaguely remember how I felt after reading book 4, 5 and 6.

Globet of Fire left me feeling awed slightly sad, though it was the movie that brought out the grief over Cedric's death.
Order of Phoenix left me feeling stunned, as to how quick Sirus died and it was so in the movie (fleetingly fast if I have to critise)
Half Blood Prince left me feeling wretched, for the great headmaster was lost and the later chapters was only slightly less than a nightmare to read on.

Deathly Hallows was different. The agnoy and adrenal rush it caused in the early chapters (and later of course) ended in an odd sensation. A strange calmness. Knowing that things were different, yet there was no reason to fight against it.
It gave me a new perspective to what my friend had always tried to tell me. His words, unfortunately did not sink in as well as the book did.

"He accepts that he must die, and understands that there are far, far worse things in the living world than dying.
- Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore
One statement that I had always known and tried very hard to convince ? understand ? no. Perhaps, accept it.

It would be great if Dumbledore was not someone's imagination.
It would also be great if the movie would show the essence of this book, which I forsee it would not, considering how screwed up OOP was.

Nonetheless, I really recommend the book. Worth the money. Worth as a brillant keepsake to HP series.

On the sidenote. JY said I was mentioned in YJC today. (No wonder I kept sneezing) All thanks to the NTU talk in school. Ah wells. Since I knew not many people there, it didn't bother me lol. Strange eh ? Only to be remembered after you left the place.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007
[[p0++3r]]

I would be lying if I said Harry Potter and the Order of Phoenix : MUST SEE.
For avid HP storybook fans, they would certainly be disappointed. What's considered important or rather highly anticipated would not be there. Essence of story was lost. Focus = unfocus

Things like:
1. Quidditch (obviously, but doesn't matter much)
2. More scenes on how Hogwarts student teaches Umbridge a lesson
3. Ron got straggled by the brains
4. How each DA member lost to the deatheaters in Department of Mysteries (they clumped all together)
5. Inconsistency between GOF and OOP, the way Sirius head popped out of the firewood, I'd expect the magic should be the same.
6. How the DAs became smart all of a sudden, to be using the non-verbal spells even before when they were taught

Maybe they considered the pay wages of the cast
which was why they got Cho to betray the DA ?
which was why it was Luna who told Harry about the Thestrals?

Everything was toned down which made it looked like a poor attempt to touch every detail that to their intepretation was supposed to be touched. Cast was rightly fitted though. (Alas, not much of the stylish Bellatrix)

For a fast and slightly warped translation of the book, watch the movie.
For the amazing effects, watch the movie.
For the stunning scenery, watch the movie.

A show to watch if you liked Potter series.
But.. not worth a second watch.
Okay, does this count as a critic ? Bleh i don't freaking care.

[[exp|@n@+|on]]

"Your emotions are all over the place right now,but's not like that's necessarily a bad thing. Let them lead the way and you should find that things pick up real quickly"

"In this situation, the best is yet to come. Really -- believe it! Stand wholeheartedly behind your plans for the future, and you'll soon see that your certainty pay off. What you want will come to pass if you have faith

Horoscope for the day.

It explained it all.
Though, it was good to have that pep talk.
Kept on having people asking me what's wrong.
Many a times I had to answer nothing.
Perhaps I should say back :
" I can't tell you as you are one of the reason ? "

Nah, bullshit.

It surprised me though the person giving pep talk weren't anyone I was close to.
When you were close to someone, you became a telescope.
You saw only the big picture, but could no longer tell what was wrong with something that was just infront of you.

Pep talk came timely.
Very much appreciated.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007
[[s+|l]]

Woke up early to tend aunt's shop today.
Not sure whether it was due to the weather or me waking up early.
I moodswinged like hell.

You could either said I looked as if I wanted to kill someone, or someone died.
Accompanied that with my freak hairstyle you got yourself a distorted emily the strange.
Mask on. Mask off.

Really have to thank some peeps who kept me sane while I was @ the shop.
Not to mention the movie as well.
Morbid was the only word I could think about.
Not sure why either.

Before more people complained that they could not understand. I'd shut up.

the more i see the less i know the more i want to let it go

[[s+0p]]

Damn that intuition.
Is nice not knowing things sometimes.
Hating this particular person more and more each day.
Unsure of the reason,just pure hate i guess.

Oh. Sometimes human err-ed.
Illusions made people blind.
What they should or should not have seen.
It's been sometime, maybe.. I ought to stop.

Mind's in a whirl now.
Too many things
To many details of people's life.
Time wasted on thinking of them.
Thinking for them.
For once, just think for yourself please.

If something anticipated arrives too late it finds us numb, wrung out from waiting, and we feel - nothing at all. The best things arrive on time.
Dorothy Gilman

I'd say better late than never.

Monday, July 23, 2007
[[h|gh]]

I am being selfish. I know.
Just can't help getting high.
Forgive.

ISIS ISIS all the way ISIS !

Sunday, July 22, 2007
[[s|ck]]

It's Mr. Loo's birthday today =)
But that bhb guy sms-ed me to remind me to wish him Happy Birthday =.=

Been slipping in and out of sleep these couple of days.
I ought to be glad that I only have sore throat, bout of cold and impending cough and not deague fever.

Been a "little girl" ok, pampered girl these few days.
People like Simin, Liying, Tin actually listened to me whined.

Slipped in and out of sleep these couple of days.
Couldn't stand how flu was making me feel.
All tears despite me not being sad.
Single eyelid and all =(

I thought I thought wrong during Ta Khent.
Looked like my intuition was still on sensitive mode even when I was sick.
I thought I heard wrong,but I wasn't as blind even though I closed my eyes.
Nonetheless, it would be history soon, so my best bet was to ignore.

A new mago might be coming back from States.
Yay!!

Saturday, July 21, 2007
[[|s|s]]

Figured out I should do this ultra long update to satisfy not only my fan(s) (ahem) and my memory.
Ta Khent was the 2nd most memorable camp I had been to. The synergy of ISIS surprised me, as I always thought such synergy could only happened to those like-minded people.

It was as though we were on drugs -overly high at some point (most) of the time or ultra stoned when the effect wore off. It was a no brainer as to why we got the "Best Teamwork" award.

Initiation night was...... memorable
The slide down was so freaking mud even though there wa much mud all over. The stupid tomato bonding was freak disgusting!! Passing tomato filled spoons n twines through the sleeves of the shirt. SO damn glad I wore the YJ shirt.

The haunted house made me lost my voice =( Ok I got scared initially, my next reaction was to make them deaf (=.=) finally, we just stopped shouting so that they knew they couldnt scare us, ahahaha.

I shall blog about the rest of the activities the moment I regain brain power.

Quite a no of people I had to thank during Ta Khent. Again, not in any particular order.
1. ISIS GLs and SAs - Best seniors ever
2. ISIS !!! - We are just plain crazy and high
3. Mr. Tongs - For your help rendered
4. Mr. Peabrain - Entertainment through SMS =)
5. SiMin - Everything
6. All those who took care of the whiny me after I fell sick =)

ISIS rule!!

Sunday, July 15, 2007
[[m|ss]]

Ok I am damn heartless not to miss people. Some people whined
So the list (not in any order)
I will (and try to) miss :
1. Family
2. Mago(s)
3. Ms. Beth ( I TYPED UR NAME!!)
4. Mr. Tongs ( For all the crap I've been asking you to do)
5. Mr. Loke ( For pictures of WTC ahahaha. Nah, for those things, too complicated and too much to jot)
6. Mr. Peabrain (For my self assumed ice cream etc etc)

Right.. have I left out anyone important ?
I guessed not.
Ok, SMS is fine as I need some entertainment once in a while.

Ta Khent.
Bye people, see you in a few days time.

[[+@Kh3n+]]

Pre-camp was kinda unexpected.
It seemed like I was back to J05 where I clicked with people almost immediately thanks to the passion I once had for NP.
I hate the aftermath of J05 though, after what Mel said, so I sincerely hoped that Ta Khent would not be the same.
I had fun at the precamp, considering there were quite a number of anti-jgd (jia gang dang) people like me.
Seniors were friendly and kind (for now) much the opposite of those I saw in NUS.

All packed for Ta Khent, the stupid Secret Pal gift, as well as the SP night stuff. Cant believed they insisted on dress. I shan't wear one.

Luppy should be on plane to States now.
I told him to take some pictures of WTC.
Whoops. That set me laughing.
Let's hope everything went well.

I am going to miss mago
I am going to miss Apple
I am going to miss Internet
I am going to miss my mails

So glad that the camp will be a distraction.
Despite the uneasines I am feeling now.
Read through the few back entries again.
Relieved more than anything now.

Don't miss me!
Wait. Miss me =)

Friday, July 13, 2007
[[CBD]]

"One's aim will be accomplished although it seems futile at first. One shoots an arrow to reach the void,but one could not succeed. Finally, one does reach it"
That's the second time I have asked the same question. That's the second time I got this answer.
Can someone enlighten me the length of time I have to wait ?
Can someone tell me what shall I do ? Nothing ? Maybe.

Anyway, YT and me went Army market to get some stuff. Saw erm.. shit. I forgot the name. I forgot where I saw the person before as well. Some NP guy la. We left the place quickly cos I didn't like to see so many restless people.

Went Bugis street. Couldn't understand why did I even follow when I have no energy to even hunt for clothes. Bought 1 shorts for the camp, and found nothing else to my liking. Much better off shopping in shopping centres with air-cons.

Since we had so much time on hand, we went walking to god knows where before ended up in Raffles, me eyeing the bag. Have decided to make this worthwhile investment. After Ta Khent ok ? YAY!!

Ok, I am really going to fall asleep liao. Let me know if I have written nonsense here.
So glad that the ice berg is off.
Extraordinary how fragile yet steadfast friendship can be.

[[3y3s]]

Quite a number of people had been complaining about the eye picture being scary. I still don't think it can give people nightmares though. Nonetheless I had been very kind to change.... friendster 1st picture to another narcisstic picture newly edited.

I have decided to bravely show the world my new er.. distratous hairstyle. Laugh as loud as you wish. For all I care. I am an exceptionally high self-esteem person. Hurhur. ANYWAY :

Tada!

How could I not take advantage of the white wall in my aunt's shop.

Which reminded me, I went to tend her shop yesterday.
The big head you saw over there is my cousin.
The yellow bunch you saw over everywhere, were called flowers (yes say with me, flooooo-werr-rrrsss)

Mr. Tongs came over after his lunch to pass me dvds to watch (cue: yay!!!)
He told me there were 3 super kpo girls who were wanting to see how (ugly) i look like.
Thank goodness none of them could have a proper view of me.

Righty next week would be Ta Khent and I am pretty sure none of you guys will miss me.
I am stil waiting for something miraclous to happen, seeing that it is me who make that blunder.
Somehow, I felt that I overestimate that someone's character.
I took the 1st step, I expected that someone to do so too.
In case any idiot at this time is thinking " AHH BP is in a BGR, now who's that unlucky guy ?"
Sorry to disappoint. No.
Nonetheless I shall wait until that someone becomes more than just being sane.

Sunday, July 08, 2007
[[ps-3d]]

This is what I have decided to do when I am bored.
Least time past fast.
I think less =D

I made my 1st cloud n butterfly with PS lol.

This is something random.

Right. I shall go bathe.
This is so fun.

[[|@y0U+]]

Is pretty much obvious that I have changed the layout.
Is not that obvious that I have took my time to search and compile the images.
Is perhaps obvious that white is not the tone to use.

I wanted to use black.
I remembered some words I blanked out entries back would be seen.
Literally it meant :
What can be seen becomes invisible
What is invisible can be seen
So that means I can't use a black layout when I blanked out my words using white.

I accidentally clicked on one of the archives (obviously not mine)
I saw the invisible.

Thing about invisibility is that :
It is either for someone's eyes or for your own eyes only.

I was certain that it was for my eyes.
So I took a long look at them.
I still felt that pang.
Yet I knew, time only stood still here.
Not everywhere else.
It seemed silly to the point of ridiculous to be thinking of it.

I hope I have spread the message loud and clear.
Layout matters.
Especially if you have blanked out words of racism, anti-governments.
Or even a short I heart You.
Others might either get pissed off or a hair standing experience.

Well. Not that everyone has so much free time like me to roam around.

To those who have showered concerns the moment they saw the previous entry, thanks.
To those (quite a few) who have no idea what I was talking about, relax, the facts there were only meant for a certain few to understand.
To those certain few, if you didn't understand a single sentence, I am truly speechless.

Right enjoy the song.

Saturday, July 07, 2007
[[0u+]]

I promised by the end of this week. So yes, here goes. Mr. Tongs, try not to analyze too much.

I SHOULD NOT have listen and quit the job in June end. Even though I had it with the Aussies. I had it with the god damn idiot.
I should have probably find another freak temp job before school starts.

I hate this feeling. This feeling that I was having before I had Olympus. Which was why it made me soooooo grateful to that place long enough for me to keep on wasting my time there. Maybe I am getting retarded like what Tin said.

These few days have been shit. I mean, after the excitement of getting back my freedom. It's nothing when it was morning, or rather afternoons, considering the time I woke up everyday.

The nights.... were really unbearable.
I pushed back my sleeping time as far as I could.
Surfing aimlessly so that I would not SLEEP.
Cos that's when the nightmare began.

Everyday, even before my friends said anything
I felt a change in them.
Something no less than major
Is either something so absurdly happy
Or something that made me think "wth am i doing"

And to no one's surprise.
I thought of time
and I thought of.... fill in your own bloody blanks.

I hate the way it made me feel.
I was naive enough to think that others understand.
Is either they brush me off with good nights
or drain me with their stuff.
Is not as if I fucking ask for the problems at night
knowing that I could call no one at 3am

Is not my fault that I wanted to be selfish
That all I wanted to talk about sometimes, is perhaps me and not you.
Okay maybe it was my bad,
I cant seem to express all this out.

Is getting harder for me not to think of questions like when will all these end. How long more time do I have with you guys.
I hate being so optimistic about things, knowing that I make it sounds as though I have a terminal disease and I am dying in 5 years time.

Every gathering.
Every meeting.
It all starts with joy and ends in nightmare.

Why can't I just be normal for once.
Not thinking about it.
When does my life truly starts ?

To put it nicely,
I am in torment.

To put it crudely
I am in deep shit.

Thursday, July 05, 2007
[[w33k]]

It's been sometime since I last updated. So just a quick update of the weekend then.

Sat was "Independence's Day" for the Americans living in Sembawang. Yet another spectecular fireworks display, that was for my eyes only. HAH! Ok, for my family. Apparently so since people ALWAY forget about this special day. Which reminds me Luppy is gg to the states. Lucky him. Anyway, had Sakae with the family, and it got me thinking how many more of such get together will I have with them.

Sun was laksa day! Really appreciated them coming all the way down to Yishun (though is only like 4-5 stops from their home) just to do this spastic thing. Had a treat from Irene's "distant" auntie which ended up in a waste. Urgh, so much for being kind.

The girls came to my house and yep, just slacking around with movies. Took a few stupid, spastic pictures @ the carpark where we had our dinner. Cup noodles to remember those day we had back in MF.

It's been like 6years since we were together. They got on to qns like " Who will get her bf next" " Who will get married 1st" etc.
I hate talks of the future and the past. Hell, I am hating every minute.

I promised someone I'd write wth is exactly wrong with me by the end of this week.
I am going to write in the next post as I cant stand this feeeling accumulating in me.

type